Wedding Planning Communication Tips from the Golden Girls

Recently, at a wedding we coordinated, a bridesmaid quoted the Golden Girls theme song in her speech.

She is my hero. 

All my friends who know me, know I'm a huge Golden Girls fan. You want to talk peak TV? This is one of the best written and performed TV series ever (and created by a woman, the brilliant Susan Harris).  We're all a little Rose, Dorothy, Sophia, and Blanche.  Take them all together, and you have a group of women who represent optimal communication skills with loved ones.

Weddings require constant communication - business negotiation and sharing creative choices with vendors, passing along organizational directives to venues and coordinators, and lots (LOTS...lots) of potentially volatile conversations with family, depending on your kin's unique dynamics.  But if you follow these communication tips straight from my favorite TV show ever, you'll be able to navigate potential landmines with much more ease.

Don't get offended by honesty.

Words can hurt - but there's a difference between fightin' words and 'telling it in like it is.'  If you're always late, and a bridesmaid warns you to better be on time on the wedding day - don't be offended, she's helping you build in a cushion to your timeline.  The Girls never pulled any punches with each other - but there was sincere affection behind all their barbs.

Via Touchstone Television /

Via Touchstone Television /


Forgive and forget.

You can hold a grudge six ways to Sunday that your stepmother is stealing your thunder by obsessing over HER dress search for the wedding and never letting you be the star of any wedding related outings. Guess what - calling her on it probably won't make it better, it'll just make her more defensive.  Laugh it off for what it is, and if something truly serious comes up, gently bring it up with the offending person, clear the air, and offer forgiveness, otherwise you won't be able to move on - and then how are you going to have room in your heart to let in the joy and happiness of the wedding itself?  The Girls were almost brutally honest with each other, but they listened carefully and resolved situations in order to preserve their friendships. If they came across someone who wouldn't budge, they shrugged their shoulders and moved on.




Have some cheesecake ready at all times.

Worst case scenario?  Set any troublesome relationships off to the side for a night and indulge in a little self care.  A yoga class, drinks with your (sane) friends, reading a good book with a cup of tea, binge watch your favorite show (ahem), tucking into a cheesecake with your fiance around the kitchen table - these problems aren't that big a deal in the long run, and you don't have to solve them.  Give yourself a break!